Stories
Sometimes it is helpful to read about how another person benefited from the opportunity to sit down and discuss what happened. Sometimes it is the community member, sometimes the officer and often both. On another page, I'll share with you statistics on how mediation significantly improves satisfaction of both parties, a study from San Francisco demonstrating the cost savings, or how officers who go through mediation have less complaints filed against them in the future - but for now the stories. Real people, both officers and community members, caught in tough situations and walking away from mediation saying, "That was really helpful!"
The names, locations and any identifying characteristics have been changed, the essence of what took place is here.
The names, locations and any identifying characteristics have been changed, the essence of what took place is here.
Learning from the Situation
Two sisters from out of town were here to support their high school team. Their parents decided to take advantage of being in town and run some errands. They explained to their daughters that they’d be back before the game ended.
Toward the end of the game, a fight broke out and the cops told everyone to leave. The girls didn’t immediately see their parents, were confused, reacted, and the cops pushed harder for the girls to leave the immediate area. They did.
The parents came back and couldn’t immediately find their daughters. They found them, but there were a few anxious minutes.
In the end – the parents, their daughters and the two officers met in mediation and discussed what happened in a safe environment. The parents had calmed down and were able to understand the officer’s concern regarding the fight, and why they ordered everyone to disperse. The officers were able to hear and understand the parents fear and anger at not finding their daughters.
Parents apologized for overreacting, and said maybe it wasn’t a good decision to leave their daughters at the game. The officers agreed that they could have listened more carefully to the girls and taken a minute or two to find a better solution.
Toward the end of the game, a fight broke out and the cops told everyone to leave. The girls didn’t immediately see their parents, were confused, reacted, and the cops pushed harder for the girls to leave the immediate area. They did.
The parents came back and couldn’t immediately find their daughters. They found them, but there were a few anxious minutes.
In the end – the parents, their daughters and the two officers met in mediation and discussed what happened in a safe environment. The parents had calmed down and were able to understand the officer’s concern regarding the fight, and why they ordered everyone to disperse. The officers were able to hear and understand the parents fear and anger at not finding their daughters.
Parents apologized for overreacting, and said maybe it wasn’t a good decision to leave their daughters at the game. The officers agreed that they could have listened more carefully to the girls and taken a minute or two to find a better solution.
Radar & Tools
Tim was pulled over and was immediately angry. He hollered at the cops for wasting his time, the taxpayers time and why weren’t they doing important work.
The cops were angry in return, threatened to take him in if he didn’t immediately change his behavior. There was a very tense few moments. Tim backed down, but filed a complaint.
Both Tim and the officers were anxious to mediate, they wanted to talk about what happened and explain their different perspectives. As the story unfolded, several months ago, Tim had a lot of expensive tools stolen out of the back of his pick-up truck in another city. He didn’t feel the cops in that city had done anything to help him recover the tools.
They discussed police procedures around stolen property, the officer explained how his house was also broken into three months ago and the ‘humanness’ of both of them became apparent. They both apologized for over-reacting.
The cops were angry in return, threatened to take him in if he didn’t immediately change his behavior. There was a very tense few moments. Tim backed down, but filed a complaint.
Both Tim and the officers were anxious to mediate, they wanted to talk about what happened and explain their different perspectives. As the story unfolded, several months ago, Tim had a lot of expensive tools stolen out of the back of his pick-up truck in another city. He didn’t feel the cops in that city had done anything to help him recover the tools.
They discussed police procedures around stolen property, the officer explained how his house was also broken into three months ago and the ‘humanness’ of both of them became apparent. They both apologized for over-reacting.
Other Stories
